Junkie: A Hucow Story

Amanda scratched her arm. How long have I been doing that? The skin had not yet torn, but it was red and blotched. I need to fix. Get right. Correct. She spun in her chair and looked around her room. Did I lose one? No, who am I kidding. I counted them. Each one. Over each day. I planned for this. I planned to stop. Nevertheless, she combed through her room, looking for one of the small blue pills. She restrained herself from tossing the place like prison cell on inspection day, but the urge remained. She checked her purse, her jackets, her pockets, the drawer where she normally kept them, she crawled around on the floor, and she dug through her garbage looking for the reused aspirin bottle to make sure it was empty. Nothing.

Amanda crawled back over to her computer and sat down. The message from Ben remained on the screen. “Can I see you tonight? Last time was so much fun.” The sight of it intensified her anxiety. She’d been using when she met Ben and every time she’d seen him since then. The woman Ben knew was not the woman unconsciously scratching her arm. Ben knew her on Bee. He liked her on Bee. She liked everyone on it, but Ben the most. She wanted to see him as bad as she wanted another of those little blue pills with the cartoon bee stamped on them. She brought her fingers to the keyboard and typed in jerking pauses. “Yeah! Come by my place? Any time after 8?”

The response was immediate. “After 8. See u then.”

Amanda took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. I have six hours to find Eddie and convince him to sell to me. I can always cancel if it comes to that. Ben would understand, probably. No he wouldn’t. He would immediately call someone else to fuck. I’m nothing to a guy like him, just a convenient piece of ass with big tits. Fuck. Nothing’s gonna get done sitting here. As she turned to get dressed, she saw the disaster of her room. She hadn’t cleaned in days. Her compulsion to appear tidy almost equaled her need for the drug. She started picking up clothes and tossing trash with an impatient haste.

Amanda’s thoughts about Ben were incorrect. In truth, Ben quite liked her, but in the way of some men he had little capacity to show it other than through appreciation of her body. While she scrambled to clean her apartment, Ben sat in his own apartment across town congratulating himself for being brave enough to ask to see her again. He enjoyed the sex, of course, but he craved her company as well. If he had known Amanda’s feelings or if she had known about his, then their current collision with fate could have been avoided. But the wheels turned. Ben planned out the rest of his day with more than a little thought dedicated to which type of underwear he should wear. Amanda cleaned while trying to ignore the thoughts of need plaguing her mind. And Eddie, a high school drop out who lived a life of luxury, handled the nasty business of acquiring a supply of his most popular product. Bee.

Still oblivious to the world outside of her own mind, Amanda went to the bathroom to make herself look respectable before heading out into the world. She stripped and tossed aside the old clothes. Before dressing again, she looked at herself in the mirror for a longer time than most should. This is the body he likes. Not what I was before. This thought, at least, had no path to being false. The Amanda in the mirror stood at five foot, ten inches with a slim waist, wide hips, and full breasts. Her hips were soft and rounded to the back to form an ample, firm ass. Her breasts hung at a pleasing angle from her chest, not too steep to appear fake and not too sloping to appear bored or overused. Short, thick nipples stuck out from the center of a perfect circle of pink coloration on otherwise white skin. They made her feel wonderful just in appearance, but a squeeze would easily elicit a soft moan from her lips. This was not the Amanda of the past.

Before she met Ben or any of the people she currently called friends, Amanda had been a rail thin girl with bony hips and a flat chest. She struggled to find clothes to fit her since the cuts of women’s clothes account for a woman’s shape and men’s clothes ran too large for her petite figure. Sometimes she found boy’s pants that would fit, but they did nothing to help her body image problems. She wore large shirts and sweaters so no one would notice her small chest. This succeeded more than she intended, and no one noticed her at all. She flitted through life under the category of “also”. Boys would convince other boys to go to parties because “Tiffany, Amber, and Britney would be there and also Amanda.” Then she heard about Bee.

Habitual addiction is different than a physical addition. With the latter, in order to function properly the body requires whatever the addicting substance may be. With the former, habitual addiction, there is no physical dependency on the drug, but a mental one. For example, Amanda. Her body had no physical requirement for Bee. Her cells continued to function, her synapses continued to fire, and her organs did not rebel. But her mind had become addicted nevertheless. The first time she took it had been transcendental. It happened at a party with a few of her girl friends. Amanda took her first pill, and the rest of the night became a warm, fuzzy blur. Bee’s first sign was a heat spreading through the body, but concentrating in the breasts. Amanda remembered it as the feeling of tiny star bursts throughout her body. After the onset, Bee gave her the feeling of euphoric intoxication but without the numbing of dulled senses. Above everything though, had been the overwhelming horniness. One of her girlfriends had it worse than Amanda did. The poor girl masturbated in the middle of the dance floor. Amanda had watched, enthralled, and her own arousal peaking. She found a guy named Kevin for what she needed. He took her back to his house and fucked her senseless.

She dosed again two nights later. And again the night after that. The rush of the heat and the feeling of bliss that followed was too powerful to live without. Amanda couldn’t understand how people could exist without it. She looked at the others around her and thought they should be tearing their hair out for a hit of the drug. The mornings after dosing weren’t like hangovers. Alcohol is a mortgage. Get a double dose of life for six hours and pay it back with interest the next day. Bee didn’t mortgage anything. It was like winning the lottery, but only having a few hours to use the money. By morning it was gone, and Amanda felt the worse for its absence. She never stopped to consider whether or not the growing need for the drug said something about her state in life or her psychological makeup. Primarily because she was distracted by one of the drug’s side effects. Growth.

After the first week, she noticed her clothes didn’t fit right any more. She wore a bra not so much for support, but for a general shape. The A-cup no longer held her. The girls she met who had been using bee for a long time had tits the size of basketballs and curves to match, but she didn’t think it would actually happen to her. As her chest and ass filled out, she was happy to ignore her dependency on the drug to feel happiness or anything other than a need for more. By the time she met Ben, the drug had nestled itself in the core of her mind, but she had not yet noticed the need yet.

Amanda dressed in a pair of jeans that hugged her curvy hips and a loose fitting t-shirt. She didn’t bother to wear a bra because she enjoyed the gawking looks she got as her nipples poked through her shirt. Eddie won’t be at home. He picks up product. I can catch him at the Warehouse. She rummaged through her purse and pulled out a wad of bills. Only need one. Well, two. She counted out enough for three, shoved the money in her pocket, and headed out.

The night she met Ben was one of the best nights of her life. He’d certainly noticed her body, but he also seemed interested in talking. She’d fucked six guys since going on bee. Between the half dozen of them, they’d said about ten words: Oh, God, Please, Don’t, Stop, You’re, So, Hot, Fuck, Me. Ben had a much wider vocabulary until later in the night and once again after that. Lying together in bed between their lovemaking, they’d talked about their lives and their futures. They’d shared funny stories, a few sad ones, and lots of optimistic thoughts. Amanda held nothing back, partly because of the drug lowering her inhibitions, but chiefly because, for the first time in her life, she felt connected to someone. The sex blurred it though. The drug’s payoff was sex, and it needed its completion. Ben had been on the verge of confessing a great affection for her, when she grabbed his cock and told him to fuck her doggy style until she came. He eagerly accepted the offer, but the opportunity for furthering emotional intimacy passed.

Since then they’d been together several times. Each time she was “buzzing,” as they called it. Her breasts continued to grow, which Ben commented on only once, noting that she seemed bustier than before. He wrote it off as a drunk memory. She attempted to stop taking the drug, but failed immediately. Instead, she settled for not going out while on it. She stayed in, thought about Ben’s cock, and drilled herself with a dildo until the horniness passed. Through it all, she saw no problems with her life other than the consistent lack of Ben. His offer to see her came as a great relief and as she crossed town to find Eddie, she grew wet and felt her breasts swell while she imagined Ben hunched over her, thrusting.

The Warehouse was a club where Eddie plied his trade. He owned the place through a subsidiary of a subsidiary of a dummy corporation. He owned most of his property in that manner. He built his empire on Bee and had no intention of letting the drug also be his downfall. Through it all, Eddie remained a man of the people. He dabbled in other, more insidious drugs but let his lackeys take care of it. Bee was special and needed an expert’s touch. It had to be controlled, tightly. A dealer had no trouble selling a junkie their last fix because that fool had been used up and drained already. In the eyes of the underworld, most overdoses were self correcting problems, but not with Bee. A Bee overdose was something else entirely. Eddie didn’t like for his girls to go down that path. It meant the loss of a customer. Other dealers recovered their investment by taking advantage of the women’s new state. Some of them even pushed the girls over the edge to keep their whorehouses staffed. Eddie found it despicable and bad for business. He’d only even had one, and she’d begged for it. After that, he moved his business to upper class girls, the ones who had a prudish enough upbringing to slow them down once they needed it.

Amanda arrived at the Warehouse and spoke to the man at the door. He recognized her and barely heard a word she said as he ogled her nipples poking through the shirt. He let her in. She’d never been to the club in the daytime before. The club earned its moniker by being a refurbished furniture distribution warehouse. With the absence of spilled beer and loud music, Amanda could smell old sawdust and the faint scent of pine or cedar still ingrained in the walls. The room looked immense without a throbbing mass of people in it. A few staffers meandered about, preparing for the evening. The club seemed anemic, as though its spirit had been torn out of it and the shell had carried on, much like Amanda felt without the drug in her system. She asked a bartender if Eddie was around. He pointed her towards an office.

“Come in.” Eddie sat behind a desk covered in papers. He had a stack of envelopes in front of him, and his hand worked in a flourish every few seconds as he signed checks. He glanced up, “Amanda! How nice to see you, have a seat, I’m almost done with this. Damned kitchen staff. I’ve tried to tell a few of them, but they never listen. Direct deposit would be so much simpler, but they don’t have bank accounts. They get their check, take it to one of those places that cash it for them, and then blow the money on what the hell ever. How do people think they’ll get ahead doing that? It’s why I like girls like you, Amanda. Good heads on their shoulders. They keep their jobs while knowing how to enjoy themselves.” He tapped his pen on the table as he moved the stack. “They don’t over indulge.” The pen clicked again and he looked up. “Out already?”

Amanda folded her hands in her lap. She felt as though Eddie’s eyes could stare through her and still see the small girl who came to him wanting her first pill. “Not something I planned on. Something has come up, a special occasion. I just need a couple to get through the weekend.”

Eddie rubbed his chin. He reached into the lower drawer of his desk and pulled out a tablet. The screen flared to life and in a few moments, he had a spreadsheet in front of him. Though the chart had dozens of names, Amanda’s neared the top. “You’ve been going a little hard, sweetie.”

Oh god, he’s not going to give it to me. “A little, but what’s the harm right? I wasn’t going to use all three this weekend. I figured I’d take a break after tonight, but then I didn’t want to just buy one pill while I’m here, you know?”

Eddie put the tablet back in its hiding place. “People like Bee because it is a low consequence drug. You have to use it a whole lot before anything bad happens. But every thing has a price, including this.”

“I can handle it, Eddie.”

“Why is it so important?”

Amanda hesitated. She didn’t know the answer herself. Because of Ben. Because I need it. Because what’s the point without it. “There’s a guy. I really like him and he’s only seen me when I’m buzzing. We’re spending the weekend together. I want to explain everything, but I’m afraid if he doesn’t see the me he’s known at first, he’ll freak.” She meant enough of it to sound genuine.

Eddie did the math in his head. “I’ll give you three. Under no circumstances should you dose tomorrow if you dose tonight. I should give you one. But we built a relationship on trust, don’t we?” A sick swell in Eddie’s gut poisoned his words. He did see through Amanda’s new body to the old rail of a girl she had been. He enjoyed the new her much more. The other girl, the one he’d let go to far had become something only the most beautiful creatures deserved. Amanda resembled her greatly. Later, after Amanda met her fate, Eddie would deem himself guiltless, only an agent of fate and not a determinant. His fascination with the overdoses would grow, and he would go on to become a purveyor of the ascended flesh, as he would come to call it. He went to a safe on the back wall, opened it, and then opened a second compartment in its side. From there he retrieved a metal case and a small plastic bag. He transferred over three of the blue pills with the cartoon stamp leering up at him. Everything secured again, he brought the baggie to his desk. Amanda handed him the money and took her prize. “Remember. Do not dose tomorrow.”

The trip home took longer than she’d have liked. The pills burned a hole in her pocket. She almost took one the second she was out of Eddie’s sight, but knew if she did the rest of the day would be wasted. Ben would find her stuffing her own pussy like a madwoman. Though it was a struggle, she managed to get home without dosing. The apartment still needed some cleaning, and she needed to shower and dress. The activity helped distract her, but she still pondered over Eddie’s warning. Why can’t I have the pills two days in a row? I’ve done it plenty of times before? Was he just trying to scare me? Bragging about his good customers like that, maybe he just wanted to make it clear that I have to come begging for his approval any time I wanted a hit. What’s to stop me from going to someone else, other than I don’t know anyone else. How does he know I’m not reselling them, for that matter? The answers to her questions nagged from a quieter more reasonable part of her mind. He knows I’m not reselling them because my tits are about to fall out of this shirt.

She lost track of the time as she cleaned dishes. Noticing it, she hurried to get in the shower. If I take it now, I should be good by the time Ben gets here. With great relief, she grabbed the bag and slipped out one of the pills. Popping it on her tongue, she swigged a bottle of water and down it went. Relief and an excited anticipation replaced the gnawing anxiety. She put the baggie down and went to get in the shower. The water rushed over her body. Steam billowed up from behind the shower curtain as the heat caused her blood vessels to open. The drug coursed through her system, and the searing water was outpaced by the blooming heat coming from inside her body. Her breasts felt full and sensitive. Her body tingled from head to toe. She climbed out of the shower and dried off. Dabbing her breasts dry with the towel set off micro explosions in her brain. Before she realized it, she was sliding a finger along her slit.

A knock at the door.

Amanda snapped out of her reverie. She looked at her phone’s clock. 8:32. Christ, how long was I in the shower? The knock came again. She pulled a towel around herself and headed towards the door. As she walked, she noticed the pills still on the table where she’d left them. She picked it up with the intent of hiding them from Ben, but a strange urge overtook her. He didn’t say not to take a double dose tonight. Without hesitation, she opened the bag, dumped a pill into her hand, and threw it into her mouth. She swallowed and it stuck, dryly, against the back of her throat. Shit, what the fuck did I do that for? Her heart thumped loudly in her ears. The knock came again, louder. “Just a minute,” she called with a cough. What should I do? Go throw up? Can this stuff kill me? A new wave of heat bloomed out from her core. With it, her fear washed away. What’s done is done.

She opened the door. “Hey!”

“Oh, sorry,” Ben said in his usual cheerful voice. “Didn’t realize you were still in the shower. I should have called.”

“No, it’s OK, come in.” She stood aside and let him enter the apartment. He smelled wonderful. Ben was tall and broad chested. As much as he’d appreciated her body, she had loved his. His chest wasn’t too hairy and very muscular. His back was a wide v that narrowed to a plump, muscular ass. Most importantly, his cock was thick and hardened quickly. “Come on,” she led the way into the bedroom.

“I can watch some TV or something until you’re dressed.”

Amanda barely heard him over the thunder of her blood pumping in her ears. His smell pervaded her senses. Her pussy ached to be touched, and her breasts felt like they were tightening. “I could get dressed or…” she let the towel drop away. Ben’s eyes widened. “We could find something to do right now.”

Ben didn’t wait. He moved to her quickly and wrapped her in his arms. They kissed, their tongues aggressively sliding against one another as his cock pressed into her stomach. He lifted her up, showing off his strength by carrying her with his hands on her ass cheeks. He spun her around and dropped her on the bed. Amanda widened her legs as he pulled of his shirt and slid down between her thighs. A rush of hot breath grazed across her engorged lips before she felt his tongue slide along her slit. As minor as it was, it pulled her first shudder of pleasure from her easily. Ben slid forward, his shoulders pushing against the back of her thighs as he got into a better position. He widened his tongue and licked in a slow, consistent rhythm. He moved his hand up to slide a finger into her, pumping slowly in time with his tongue’s work. Amanda squirmed and gyrated her hips, trying to grind her clit against his tongue as it playfully neared the bundle of nerves. Every few seconds, he would indulge her, allowing his tongue to go a little higher and his fingers to a little deeper. Her pussy hungered for it, clamping down on the invading digits and wanting something meatier. The intensity built higher and higher until finally, she clamped down on him, squeezing his head between her thighs as harsh breaths escaped her lips and her body shook from head to toe.

Then something unexpected happened. The pressure in her breasts reached its peak. In the throes of her orgasm, she squeezed her breasts and jets of white milk sprayed from the engorged nipples. Ben saw the spray of milk as he raised up from her pussy after one final kiss. They both looked astonished as the white fluid continued to ooze from her nipples. Amanda didn’t understand, but knew that the sudden burst had brought with it an amazing relief from the pressure building in her chest. Further, her once short nipples had thickened and grown out into puffy nubs, the surrounding skin of gooseflesh spreading out farther. The dribble of milk from each tickled as it rand down the underside of her engorged breasts and splashed onto her abdomen.

For his part, Ben was equally astonished, but more than that his mouth watered like a drunk seeing whiskey poured into a clear glass. Since he walked in, he thought he’d sensed something different about Amanda. She’d seemed fuller, richer than he remembered. Then there was her scent. It had been strong from the moment he walked in, but between her thighs it had been like supping from the font of heaven. It overwhelmed him and saturated him. His mind could focus on nothing but her delightful flesh as his cock almost exploded in his pants. While watching her milk flow slowly out from her nipples, he stood up and undressed the rest of the way. His cock, aching to be touched, stood out painfully erect and catching Amanda’s eye. She furtively looked at it as he climbed back on the bed, but worried about what he was thinking. “Ben, I can explain.” He didn’t wait for an explanation. He pounced on her, his mouth settling on her left nipple as his cock slid up her thigh to rest between her wet folds. He sucked. Rich, thick fluid poured into his mouth. It tasted sweet, not like the milk he’d known but more akin in taste to honey. Ben greedily sucked it down. “Oh my god…that feels so fucking good,” she moaned, her hands wrapping around his head and pushing him to her breast.

His hips flexed forward, and his cock pushed inside of her. Immediately, her pussy clenched on the invading cock. Cum in me. Breed me like a slut. The thoughts moved into her head jarringly. She’d never felt anything like it before, but knew it to be true. She wanted Ben to fuck her like an animal until she was pregnant. His cock pistoned in and out of her. He seemed thicker and longer than before. His mouth rose from her tit with a wet smack. He paused to pull her into a long kiss before lowering his mouth to the other breast and starting to drain it. The release sent a cascade of pleasure through her body. She couldn’t pinpoint when the orgasm began, but it coursed up and down her body in a never ceasing rhythm. Ben’s strokes slammed into her faster and faster. He reluctantly released her nipple long enough to lean back and pound into her harder. They both grunted in unison with his stroke until he pushed in as hard as he could. Yes, do it. Yes! Amanda felt his cock twitch and then the flood of hot cum spray into her. She started shaking and a new cresting wave of orgasm ripped through her, causing tears to run down her cheeks and milk to spray into the air.

A white buzzing filled her mind. She didn’t like it. It was in the way of the warm feelings. The buzzing got smaller and smaller until it went away. She enjoyed the soft hum of afterglow before opening her eyes. Ben was on his side beside her, his face full of wonder and exhaustion. Her eyes moved down and saw his cock was limp, but still half erect. Waiting for no invitation, she rose to her knees and bent over to suck him clean. She sensed something about her had changed, but she did not know what. Her mind focused on the swelling cock in her hand, and the wonderful smell of the man in her bed. Her chest felt heavier, much heavier, than it had before. As she leaned forward, her breasts swung underneath her and she felt a relief of pressure that improved her mood. Sitting up is hard.

“Oh baby, you don’t have — oh, that feels nice.” Ben’s head lolled back. “Guess there’s no point in trying to stop you. Shit, Amanda, I knew you were dosing, but didn’t know it was this bad. I shouldn’t have drank the milk, but I couldn’t help it.”

Amanda understood he sounded concerned, but she didn’t know why. His cock seemed bigger than the last time she sucked it. I’m lucky. Ben’s cock is so thick and long.

“I’m guessing you have no idea what I’m talking about. No, no, you can keep going. I heard about this. Bee is based on some fucked up bovine genetics stuff. If you get too much of it in your system, it starts to fuck with your body chemistry and you develop…symptoms, if you can call it that. Horror stories of chicks taking a whole bottle and growing extra tits and hooves and shit. Most girls are like you though, babe, they OD and become dumb cows. Don’t worry, I’ll help call your family or whatever. Didn’t think I wanted a cow, but this feels pretty fucking amazing. That milk though, I’ve heard it’s addicting too. A man drinks too much, and he turns stupid. Nothing but a thick dick walking around looking for his cow to fuck.”

Amanda wanted to tease him about that scenario not sounding too bad. She batted her eyes at him while stroking his wet cock up and down and tried to say “sounds fun,” but it came out as, “mooooo.”

Ben’s face contorted in worry and then relaxed. “That’s actually kind of hot. Looking at you stroking my dick while you’re fat ass is swishing in the air and those big tits swing underneath you. Mooing at me like a good cow.”

Good cow! Good cow!

“You want a reward?”

“Moo! Moo!”

She turned to face the end of the bed. Ben moved behind her and slapped her rump before sliding easily into her slit. She squeezed her nipples and a stream of milk ran out over her hand. She brought some up to her lips and tasted it. Then she remembered the other pill. Ben started to slap his body against hers, his balls swinging beneath them, heavy with cum. Ben should take a pill. More cum for me. Bigger cock for him. He seemed to notice her face screwed up in thought. “What you thinking about cow? How much you like my cock?”

Not exactly. Amanda smiled and said, “Mooooo.”